Posts Tagged love

How Would Jesus Date?

By: Gary Thomas | Brain research suggests that romantic attachment—infatuation—is more powerful than the sex drive. Neurologically speaking, it’s easier to say no to physical sexual passion than it is to regulate the rush of emotional infatuation. Consider all the sermons you’ve heard as a single about reining in the sex drive, developing skills to say “stop” in the heat of passion, not letting yourself get into intense situations, and yet, neurologically, it’s more difficult to deny powerful emotions than it is to regulate sexual passion. Have you ever heard a sermon or read a blog about emotional self control? We can’t always choose who we get infatuated with; sometimes, infatuation just happens. But we can choose what to do with that infatuation. We can choose to slavishly follow it, laugh at it, or learn to manage it. In the interest of full disclosure, I did a miserable job of this as a single, so I

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Desire is Not Love

By: Gary Thomas | When an immature 29 year old soul proclaims, “I love him; I really love him!” she may well be speaking with a five year old’s heart: “I love candy; I really love candy!” Our culture has made love and desire synonyms. As long as we mix up the two, we will never understand biblical love, and thus we will never understand sacred marriage. Biblical love is perhaps best understood (though not fully defined) with the old-fashioned word benevolence. It is wholly others-focused. A five year old loves candy in the sense that he desires it. He wants to eat it. In the same way, an immature 25 year old says he “loves” a woman because he desires her. He wants to have sex with her, or at least he wants to be around her and he wants her to want him back with the same intensity. The kind of love the Bible

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What is “homosexual”? (Older version)

How do I explain homosexuality to my tweens and teens? For some parents, this topic can be even harder to address than sex. It’s important that you pray for wisdom before entering this conversation, because sometimes our own fears or apprehension get passed onto our kids. As this conversation will look differently for each child, and as it will need to happen at all different ages, we’ll look at this in two sections. Disclaimer: This discussion is by no means complete. Nor are we attempting to make sweeping statements, or pigeon-hole anyone. What we’ve written is based on years of research, talking to literally thousands of parents annually, and personal experience. We encourage you to pray over this issue and seek wisdom from God about how to have this conversation with your kids. Kids 10 and older: Continue to affirm your child’s gender. Especially as their bodies start to develop,

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What is “homosexual”? (Younger children)

How do I explain homosexuality to my kids? If your kids are 10 or younger For some parents, this topic can be even harder to address than sex. It’s important that you pray for wisdom before entering into this conversation, because sometimes our own fears or apprehension get passed onto our kids. As this conversation will look differently for each child, and as it will need to happen at all different ages, we’ll look at this in two sections. Disclaimer: This discussion is by no means complete. Nor are we attempting to make sweeping statements, or pigeon-hole anyone. What we’ve written is based on years of research, talking to literally thousands of parents annually, and personal experience. We encourage you to pray over this issue and seek wisdom from God about how to have this conversation with your kids. Kids 10 and under: Even before you have this conversation, make

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